This is not an April Fool's Joke. But it should be.
See, I'm working in the dorm this weekend, which means that I actually worked a 9 to 5 day today. This is very unusual for me; I usually work more along the lines of, say, 7-8am, 5-6:30pm, and 8:00-11:30 at night, doing different things each time. However, at 5pm today I repaired to my apartment, exhausted after eight full hours of, well, reading a book, drawing turtles with eighth graders, drinking tea in the dorm office and other stressful activities.
I stepped into the shower at about 5:30. Now, you should know that my cat has a totally strange and inexplicable fascination with plumbing. I don't know what this is all about, but she comes running every time she hears me turn the faucet on, and usually proceeds to stare at me, the water, or the drain in the floor for a good ten minutes afterwards. She also has a peculiar habit of yowling like a maniac every time I turn off the shower, and I usually end up spending a few minutes combing my hair in my bathrobe, and being followed from room to room by a caterwauling beast.
Well, today was no different. The moment I turned on the shower she came running. However, after several minutes of watching my wash my hair she proceeded to go over to the sink, which was unfortunately filled with several inches of icky dirty toothpaste water. See, I did something unfortunate to the drain about three days ago, and I just can't seem to get the little knob that is supposed to open it to function. For three days I have been prying up the drain at the bottom of the sink every time I need to rinse some water down the drain. I have been meaning to call someone to get them to come fix this, but I keep having more important things to do, like napping.
Well, as I stood there squirting conditioner into my hair, Calypso walked up to the back of the sink and let out a monumentally indignant sounding yowl. I turned to her, and, like an idiot, said "what's the matter kitty?" Then she batted at something I couldn't see, and like magic, all of the water in the sink drained away. No, seriously. The cat fixed my sink.
I went to examine after my shower, of course, and saw that, indeed, there is some sort of stick or lever back there that opens the drain. Perhaps I am the only person in the universe that did not know this about sinks and drains. Perhaps even cats know these things, and I am just dumb.
But I swear it happened. I swear it. If I am lying, may Zeus strike me down with a lightning bolt, and may the fish of the Aegean stop biting.
On another note, the camera that the cat broke is still not fixed, as I have not found a repair shop. And just yesterday she jumped on me while I was about to spoon coffee into French Press #2, causing me to drop the whole thing, spread glass all over the floor, and cut my foot. So if she applies for some sort of fix it job, I am not hiring her. But she does get a treat or two.
6 comments:
pretty kitty face! cute!
great cat story.
I love cats! They are delicious.
No, seriously, in Glyfada Greece, there were rumors that this one taverna served Cat in it's souvlaki and there were never any cats around that place. We never knew if it was true, but we always ate at the place next store just in case.
My cat used to do all sorts of eerie/weird/smart things too, so I believe you! For one thing, she figured out how to open doors with round doorknobs. Somehow she'd jump up, catch the doornob in both paws, and twist as she fell down again. Swear to god. She also developed an extremely clever system of waking me up to get fed at 6 every morning. If sitting on my face didn't work, she'd leap up against the wall, claws out, make contact with my posters, and slowly rip her way down. The sound of my movie posters being shredded never failed to wake me. Strange thing is, she almost always chose my favourite, and never vandalised anything else - seems she knew what my prized possessions were.
But the weirdest, craftiest thing she ever did is this: we had decided to get a cat from the SPCA, and were playing with all the kittens in the little private room you can go in to see if you get along. Now all the other kittens, as is normal, were terrified of us big humans and cowered in the corner. Chloe, on the other hand, came right up to us purring and head butting, as friendly as can be. So of course we chose her, and picked up a bag of the regulation dry SPCA food on our way out. However, when we got her home, she just wouldn't eat it. She didn't seem to be having adjustment problems - she went straight to the litter box, and generally made herself at home, continuing in her friendly ways - but she just didn't seems to realise that that hard dry stuff was actually food. So we tried the wet stuff out on her and she gobbled it right up. And then, as soon as she'd determined that her salvation in the form of people who would feed her had come at last, she turned, from one minute to the next, into the BITCHIEST, UNFRIENDLIEST, LEAST INTERESTED IN HUMAN COMPANY cat I have ever seen. See, she was faking it all along just to get us to choose her. Smart, huh?
Cats know everything. Whether they choose to help or harm, however, is entirely in their control.
Kassandra, you have a cat named Chloe? So do I, actually, back home in New York. The difference is, however, that my Chloe (much like Calypso) LOVES human attention and will go to any length to get you to pet her and lavish her with affection. She has not, however, figured out how to open round doorknobs. That is quite amazing.
I'll lend you a post it note to put on your dresser. It will read "DON'T PUT STUFF ON ME!
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